Him and I vs. Him and Myself – Which is Correct?
Both “him and I” and “him and myself” are commonly misused phrases in English. Generally, neither is grammatically correct when functioning as a compound subject or object. The correct forms depend on the grammatical role: use “he and I” for subjects and “him and me” for objects. “Myself” is a reflexive or intensive pronoun, not a substitute for “me” or “I.”
Him and I or Him and Myself – Which is Correct?
The phrases “him and I” and “him and myself” are almost always grammatically incorrect when used as compound subjects or objects. The confusion often stems from a misunderstanding of pronoun cases (subjective vs. objective) and the proper function of reflexive pronouns.
The simplest way to determine the correct pronoun in a compound phrase is the “swap test” or “cover-up test.” Temporarily remove the other person from the phrase and see which pronoun sounds correct:
- If you say “Him went to the store,” it sounds wrong. “He went to the store” is correct. Therefore, for a compound subject, you should use “He and I went to the store.”
- If you say “They gave the book to I,” it sounds wrong. “They gave the book to me” is correct. Therefore, for a compound object, you should use “They gave the book to him and me.”
- “Myself” is a reflexive or intensive pronoun and cannot stand alone as a simple subject or object. You wouldn’t say “Myself went to the store” or “They gave the book to myself.”
| Phrase | Grammatical Role | Common Misuse Explained | Correct Alternative |
|---|---|---|---|
| Him and I | Compound Subject | Mixes objective ‘him’ with subjective ‘I’. Subjects require subjective pronouns. | He and I |
| Him and I | Compound Object | Mixes objective ‘him’ with subjective ‘I’. Objects require objective pronouns (‘me’). | Him and me |
| Him and Myself | Compound Subject | Incorrectly uses reflexive ‘myself’ as a simple subject. | He and I |
| Him and Myself | Compound Object | Incorrectly uses reflexive ‘myself’ as a simple object. | Him and me |
How to Use Him and I (and Why It’s Often Incorrect)
The phrase “him and I” is a very common grammatical error, often arising from what’s called “hypercorrection.” People mistakenly believe “me” is always informal or incorrect, leading them to use “I” even when “me” is grammatically required. However, pronouns must match their grammatical role in a sentence.
If the compound phrase acts as the subject of a sentence, both pronouns must be in the subjective case (e.g., “he,” “I”). If the compound phrase acts as the object of a verb or preposition, both pronouns must be in the objective case (e.g., “him,” “me”).
Example 1: Incorrect: Him and I went to the park. Correct: He and I went to the park. (Compound subject)
Example 2: Incorrect: The teacher gave the award to him and I. Correct: The teacher gave the award to him and me. (Compound object of the preposition “to”)
Example 3: Incorrect: They invited him and I to the party. Correct: They invited him and me to the party. (Compound direct object of the verb “invited”)
What are the different forms of Him and I?
The individual pronouns “him” and “I” are valid in different forms. “I” is a first-person singular subjective pronoun, while “him” is a third-person singular objective pronoun. Their corresponding forms are:
- Subjective: I, he, she, we, they
- Objective: me, him, her, us, them
Etymology of the words Him and I
The pronoun “him” derives from Old English him, which was the dative singular form of hē (he). Over time, the dative case merged with the accusative (objective) case. “I” comes from the Old English ic, a direct ancestor of its modern form, and has remained largely consistent as the first-person singular subjective pronoun.
How to Use Him and Myself (and Why It’s Often Incorrect)
The phrase “him and myself” is also typically grammatically incorrect when used as a simple subject or object. “Myself” is a reflexive or intensive pronoun, which means it should only be used in specific contexts:
- Reflexively: When the subject of the sentence is also the object of the action (e.g., “I hurt myself“).
- Intensively: For emphasis, usually immediately after the pronoun it refers to (e.g., “I myself will do it”).
It should not be used as a substitute for “me” or “I” in a compound subject or object. Misusing “myself” often arises from uncertainty about whether to use “me” or “I,” or an attempt to sound overly formal.
Example 1: Incorrect: Him and myself completed the project. Correct: He and I completed the project. (Compound subject)
Example 2: Incorrect: Please send the documents to him and myself. Correct: Please send the documents to him and me. (Compound object of the preposition “to”)
Example 3 (Correct use of ‘myself’ for emphasis): Correct: I will handle the matter myself. (Here, ‘I’ is the subject, and ‘myself’ emphasizes ‘I’.)
What are the different forms of Him and Myself?
“Myself” is one of several reflexive/intensive pronouns. These forms always end in “-self” (singular) or “-selves” (plural):
- First Person: myself, ourselves
- Second Person: yourself, yourselves
- Third Person: himself, herself, itself, themselves
Etymology of the word Myself
The word “myself” developed in Old English as me seolf, literally meaning “me self.” Over time, it evolved into the single word “myself,” serving its current role as a reflexive or intensive pronoun.
Related Concepts
Understanding pronoun cases and the specific function of reflexive/intensive pronouns is key to avoiding errors with phrases like “him and I” and “him and myself.”
- Pronoun Case: Pronouns change form depending on their grammatical role in a sentence.
- Subjective (Nominative) Case: Used when the pronoun is the subject of a verb (e.g., I, he, she, we, they, who).
- Objective (Accusative) Case: Used when the pronoun is the object of a verb or a preposition (e.g., me, him, her, us, them, whom).
- Possessive Case: Used to show ownership (e.g., my, his, her, our, their).
- Reflexive and Intensive Pronouns: These pronouns (ending in -self or -selves) have distinct uses:
- Reflexive: The action of the verb reflects back on the subject (e.g., “She taught herself to code”).
- Intensive: Used for emphasis, often immediately following the noun or pronoun it emphasizes (e.g., “The President himself approved the plan”).
Examples from Media and Literature
While grammatically correct literature rarely features “him and I” or “him and myself” in their misused forms, we can illustrate the correct principles through common speech patterns and their proper corrections.
- Common Misuse (Compound Object): “The invitation was extended to him and I.” Correction: “The invitation was extended to him and me.” (Objects of preposition ‘to’)
- Common Misuse (Compound Subject): “Him and myself are responsible for the outcome.” Correction: “He and I are responsible for the outcome.” (Compound subject)
- Correct Use of Reflexive: “I saw myself in the mirror.” (The subject ‘I’ is also the object of ‘saw’)
- Correct Use of Objective: “The secret was shared between him and me.” (Objects of preposition ‘between’)
- Correct Use of Subjective: “He and I have been working on this project for months.” (Compound subject)
Practice Exercises
Choose the correct pronoun(s) to complete the sentence.
- My brother and (I/me/myself) went fishing.
- The gift was for (he/him) and (I/me/myself).
- (He/Him) and (I/me/myself) will present the report.
- The manager spoke directly to (he/him) and (I/me/myself).
- The responsibility falls on (he/him) and (I/me/myself).
Answer Key
- I
- him, me
- He, I
- him, me
- him, me
Frequently Asked Questions
Question 1: Why do people often say “him and I” or “him and myself”?
It’s often due to hypercorrection, an attempt to sound more formal or grammatically correct by avoiding “me,” which is sometimes perceived as informal, even when “me” is the correct objective pronoun. Misunderstanding reflexive pronoun usage also contributes to the misuse of “myself.”
Question 2: How can I easily remember when to use “I” vs. “me” in compound phrases?
Use the “cover-up test.” Temporarily remove the other person from the phrase and see if “I” or “me” sounds correct. For example, in “He and I went,” cover “He and” to get “I went” (correct). In “They gave it to him and me,” cover “him and” to get “They gave it to me” (correct).
Question 3: When is it appropriate to use “myself”?
“Myself” is used reflexively (when the subject and object are the same: “I hurt myself”) or intensively (for emphasis: “I myself will ensure it’s done”). It should not be used as a simple subject or object in place of “I” or “me.”
Conclusion
In summary, the phrases “him and I” and “him and myself” are almost always grammatically incorrect in common usage. The key to correct pronoun usage lies in understanding pronoun cases (subjective for subjects, objective for objects) and the specific, limited roles of reflexive and intensive pronouns like “myself.”
Pro Tip: Mastering correct pronoun usage, especially in compound structures, significantly enhances your professional credibility and clarity in communication. When in doubt, apply the “cover-up test” to ensure you’re using the right pronoun case.
